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f4tf_button1No, I didn’t get a real estate license. It’s a fun query from Food for Thought Friday:

Is there a location that you have never had sex in/at but you would love to try it?
A car? cinema? outdoors? the beach? a church?
Do you think it will ever happen? What has stopped you doing it so far?

By “sex,” I’m going to assume they mean sex between two people, not masturbating. It’s a distinction that’s important to me.

That’s because I masturbate a lot. And with the aid of modern technology (a strap-on butterfly vibrator with a remote), I can masturbate (discretely, of course) virtually anywhere in public. Think parks, coffee bars, on walks and hikes (where it’s not possible to undress), while driving, at the mall. I’ve developed a routine where I tease myself mercilessly, flicking the remote on and off, and then find a relatively private spot to bring myself to completion. Wicked fun!

Masturbating in public relieves (among other things) the urge to fuck in off-the-wall places. Yeah, I still think about it, though. I’ve been rummaging around in my mind, trying to come up with a place that would be real turn-on to fuck a lover.

Let’s start with the list above. A car? Please, I’m an American (with a nod to our neighbors to the north, also Americans, I’ll specify that I live in the U.S.). All adolescent sex (or nearly all)  takes place in cars.

Cinema? Finger-fucking and blow jobs at the movies are another aspect of growing up in the U.S. And let’s not forget drive-in movies, which, far as I know, are unique to the U.S. I’ve definitely indulged in PIV (penis in vagina) sex at a drive-in. Not lately, though.

Outdoors? Repeatedly, often, can’t do it enough, love to feel the wind on my bare ass.

The beach? Nope. Sand.

A church? Raised Catholic, I have a serious sacrilegious streak, so you’d think it’s a natural. I guess the trauma of my upbringing (not sexual abuse, but definitely spiritual abuse) makes churches such a turn-off that the thought of fucking on a church pew or on an alter does nothing for me.

So what’s that leave?

Public bathroom sex. I’ve masturbated in public restrooms a lot (in a stall usually, once or twice at the sink watching myself in the mirror), but haven’t done it with another person.

Being an erotica writer, I’ve taken that fantasy and worked the hell out of it, though. Like this: A lunch between two women at a white tablecloth eatery, they’re planning a weekend escape of nonstop lesbian sex and debauchery. Over-heated and excited, the women rendezvous in the ladies room for a quickie.

It’s the lead to my erotic short, The XXX Weekends.

Melanie had closed her eyes. Tendrils of arousal blossomed in the pit of her belly. Heat spread across her chest and down her softly sloped stomach. Warmth flooded her abdomen, soaking her panties.

Before she could say anything, the waiter arrived with the bill.

“How exciting is it, Melanie? Tell me.”

“I’m soaked.”

Junie craned her neck to survey the dining room and leaned back in her chair. “Go to the ladies room. I’ll follow in two minutes.”


“We can do this. I know this place. The handicapped stall. Take off those wet panties and wait for me. Don’t argue. Go.”

Melanie started to say something, but stopped. Without a glance toward Junie, she picked up her purse and walked to the ladies room.

Junie checked her phone for messages, found none, and followed her.

KC CAVE - The XXX Weekends JPG small